It is on indefinite hiatus.

My beloved father died last night.

I’m on my way to my family.

Thank you for being with me for so long.

But the overnight rain has soaked the paths, so your feet get wet anyway. You get used to that.

I had lunch at a brand new shelter, which was exceptionally beautiful. I was very tempted to just stay there. But when I got up to reach for the guest book, a little wagtail flew out. It had built a nest there and had been sitting on its eggs. Now it didn’t dare to come back in. So I thought I’d better move on so that the poor bird can get back to its nest.

Instead, I ended up in a pilgrim chapel that you can sleep in. It’s very appropriate. So here I sit and feel good 😇.

I couldn’t sleep at all last night. I felt as high as a kite. The thoughts made my head almost explode. I probably didn’t get more than a couple of hours in total. At one point, I thought, ‘This is not going to matter anymore. Then I just got up and got ready.

Today’s stage was more or less boring. Some gravel roads, otherwise forest roads. The landscape was beautiful as usual. I walked a long way. As I said, nothing remarkable.

Eventually I arrived at a cabin, with a fireplace inside and absolutely no connection. I did the evening chores a bit on autopilot and stared into the fire for a long time. I knew I would sleep well tonight. I had been looking forward to doing some reading, but that was out of the question. I went out like a light. It wasn’t even 9pm 😴.

And yes. I also met an angel (you’re probably thinking, she’s now lost her marbles 😄). It was a very special and profound encounter in the most unexpected place. I was sitting at the pizzeria in Mockfjärd, which looked a bit like a highway stop. I got talking to a woman who was very touched by my hike. She loves nature, but can’t really walk properly anymore after a motorcycle accident. You probably know the feeling that you have met a person who has come into your life to stay in one way or another. I felt that way with my trail angel Knut, and I felt the same way today. I was just as touched by the meeting. I’m taking Leda all the way to Treriksröset. It means so much to be able to walk for others too. Thank you for everything, Leda.

After this meeting, I flew on. Nothing was difficult. The bag weighed nothing. Even when I filled all my water bottles shortly before the end, which meant four extra kilos, it made no difference. I could have packed 10 liters, I think. And just when I arrived at the most wonderful shelter, it started to rain.

Thank you Hazel 😊

Today I crossed Dalälven. That means I’ve come North

I slept in and enjoyed the luxury of my cabin. Just after 10am Göran, the incredibly sweet man who lives just behind the hut and who brought me firewood last night, came and asked if everything was well and if I had slept well. And if the benches weren’t too hard to sleep on? The beds could no longer be used because the load-bearing parts had ended up in the fire. I slept brilliantly. My sleeping mat is so good. I was almost packed up anyway and a few minutes later I walked up to his house to say thank you and say hello to his wife Lena. We chatted for a moment longer and then I was on my way. With dry shoes and clean socks!

Unfortunately, it didn’t last long. In fact, they were wet again five minutes after I left. The whole next 10km was more bog than path. It was very slow, very strenuous and required a lot of concentration. Every step had to be considered. I was ankle-deep in water most of the time and twice I sank down to above the knee. It’s a bit anxiety-provoking, but luckily I got my leg up again, shoes and socks and all. The bog is otherwise holding on well.

I’ve made a conscious decision to wear shoes that aren’t waterproof. If I was walking today’s stage as a day trip, I would probably have worn wellies or other waterproof shoes. But when you’re on a long hike, all shoes get wet sooner or later, and the so-called waterproof shoes take 100 years to dry again.

When I had completed the 10km, which took over 4 hours, I took a lunch break. I took off my shoes and socks, wrung out most of the water and left them to dry in the sun.

The rest of the day was easy walking and by the time I finished, the shoes were almost dry again. So that was fine.

Even though I only walked half of what I walked yesterday I’m more tired. Tomorrow it’s supposed to rain and I have to go through a small town to shop and eat pizza.

Göran and Lena

The road was mostly dirt roads, but mostly of the better kind. Some forest roads, an endless old railway line and sometimes no path at all. There was a path marked on the map, but it didn’t exist in reality. There was no alternative but to just walk through the woods and bogs, with rather wet feet as a result.

The weather was quite April-like. Bright sunshine alternated with heavy rain showers and strong winds and sometimes lightning and thunder on top of that.

I tried to find a good place to pitch the tent but nothing was on offer so I ended up walking all the way to the Spansåns fäboder.

When I got there I saw a man loading a trailer with boards. I thought I’d ask him about the shelter instead of going round looking for it. He showed me where it was and then he said there’s also a cabin and that was even better. I thought it was closed at the moment, I said. It is, he replied, but I have the key. It turns out that it’s not dilapidated as I thought, but that it’s simply due to vandalism that it’s closed. He told me that unfortunately there have been groups, mostly from abroad, who don’t understand the right of public access and they held parties and ended up using the furniture as firewood. It makes me so angry and sad at the same time. Who the hell do people think they are? Swedish municipalities make these places, whether they’re cabins or shelters, available to outdoor enthusiasts for free. They maintain them and supply them with firewood, toilet paper for outdoor toilets and other necessities, and then people have nothing better to do than use the furniture for firewood. I was furious.

Anyway, I am allowed to sleep in the cabin with the remaining furniture. And fortunately, there are quite a few pieces left. There is a fireplace, which I immediately lit and the heat spread into the room. I took the opportunity to do a bit of laundry, because there are radiators that I could switch on to dry my clothes. And they even brought me extra firewood. Now I’m warm and dry and my clothes are clean. I just feel so lucky and spoilt.

When I arrived at Morgårdshammar’s pizzeria at 10.40am, the door was already open. So I went in and said that I would like to eat there but that I needed to shop first. It was fine and I just had to leave my rucksack there. It was fantastic. I could walk the 4km without any luggage. Hooray!

I sat in the pizzeria for a long time. They had a sofa and I was comfortable there. I was enjoying the pizza maker doing his thing in the background and he told me to just take it easy. I realised that what makes it difficult sometimes is not so much the weather or bad trails, but lack of contact with people. If someone sees me and raises their arm to say hello, I immediately grow 5cm. It’s amazing what it does. On the way to the grocery store, I met an old lady pushing her walker. I smiled at her and she smiled back as if it was the first contact she had had in days. Whether it was real or not, I don’t know of course, but I thought that I can now better understand how difficult and depressing it is for people who are lonely and rarely have contact with others.

I also decided to treat myself a little. I booked a room in a hostel in Mora, which I will reach in a week tomorrow. A single room with shower and toilet, bed linen and towels. I’m really looking forward to it.

When I finally left the pizzeria, I walked easily and effortlessly. Tonight, I’m sleeping in a shelter near a mining area. So I was a little concerned about water. Shortly before I got there, I saw a man in his garden and asked him for water. He was happy to give it to me. Now I’m prepared for the evening and  the morning. My tent is set up inside the shelter. I’m fully protected from the wind and rain that will come tonight. Aren’t I’m lucky?

The first part of the trail, which is part of the Malingbo-Kloten circuit turned out to be newly marked and easy to follow. It wasn’t as soaked as I had feared either. I was very happy about that. On top of that, it’s the weekend and in the good weather people are out and about and you get chatting. It’s just so good for morale. One woman even filled my water bottle. I was absolutely delighted.

The second part of today’s stage was on a trail called Sméleden. I hadn’t read very good things about it. It was supposed to be very neglected, with collapsed shelters and lots of fallen trees in the way. But it too has been newly marked. It was a bit boring so far, but easy to hike and it’s great.

A word about following trails. As such, I have nothing against going completely off trail. But it’s definitely easier in the mountains, where the landscape is open. In the forest, and I’ve tried it, it’s sometimes difficult to get through when the paths are full of fallen trees. That’s why I currently prefer maintained trails. Let’s hope that the good start continues tomorrow when I continue on Sméleden.

Now I’m sitting in my tent in a lovely spot, surrounded by young trees and lilies of the valley. I feel good today 😊.

It was definitely a better day today. Even though it was raining.

Over the years I’ve read a lot of books about people who went on long-distance hikes and how they fared. And they all describe a dip in their mood after about 4-6 weeks. That’s not so strange after all. The special things you’ve been looking forward to for so long, the adventurous, the new, have changed. Now it’s everyday life. Now it’s just what you do. You get up, pack up and walk until you stop for the day and then you unpack again, eat some meals and repeat. And then again. And on and on. The hike has entered a different zone, so to speak. Honeymoon is over. Now rainy weather is annoying. And even though I was prepared for it, it’s no less difficult at times.

But then it’s good to have various tools in the box to counteract it. For example, I’ve been thinking a lot about why I really wanted to do this long-distance walk. My dream of the North, which I’ve told you about, is mostly the motivation to get this monumental undertaking organised and get going. But what keeps me going? What makes me get up every day and move on?

One of the main reasons I wanted to do this is that I wanted to think. I want to be able to hear my own thoughts, my own voice. The one that is free from the expectations of the world, the one that is free from all the influences around you.

I remember when I was diagnosed with cancer, it took me a long time to feel myself. To be able to find my thoughts under all the advice and expectations. I have to say, I don’t mind good advice. And expectations are often a welcome clue. But, I also find that they make it harder to hear my own voice. It was wonderful when I finally could at some stage during cancer treatment. I want to get to that place again. And that takes time. And by the way, I think very well while I’m walking. When I remind myself of that, it suddenly becomes ok again to find it a bit difficult sometimes.

And I’ve also just reminded myself that I can focus on the many positive things. Meeting people, for example, the fact that I’ve made it a third of the way on my own just by putting one foot in front of the other and that I’ve found a place to stay dry at night every time it rains.

It’s going to be alright. At least today it’s up!

Today, for the first time during my walk, I wished I could be somewhere else. Today I just missed my family so much. They will be together until Sunday because my two little nephews are being baptised. Today they all gathered together. And of course I want to be there too. I’ve known it all along, but today I just found it really difficult. Of course, I also know that it will pass and that there will probably be other days when I feel like this.

On top of that, I’m probably a bit worried about the next 250 kilometres to Mora. Tomorrow I’ll reach the end of the Bergslagsleden trail and thus the end of luxury hiking. There are some trails to follow, but reportedly less well marked, less well maintained and not so many shelters to use. It’ll be fine, though. I have maps, after all. But it’s just a bit out of comfort zone. And then there’s the prospect of rain tomorrow.

Up and down. Down and up!

It’s probably a good thing I wasn’t connected today to share this. Tomorrow will be a new day. Rain or shine!